FULFILLMENT THERAPY - Marriage & Family Therapy, Self Mastery, Self Actualization, Unmet Needs, LDS Parent, Family Connection

121 | Embracing Personal & Family Discomfort: The Power of Cognitive Dissonance as a Catalyst for Change

Show Notes:
Ever felt that tug-of-war between who you are and who you think you should be? 🤔 Join us in this episode as we unravel the mystery of cognitive dissonance and discover how embracing discomfort can lead to profound personal transformation. Today, we’ll explore how inner conflict arises when our actions diverge from our core values, learning about cognitive dissonance and practical tips to live in alignment. Get ready to align your actions with your values and pave the path to a more authentic and fulfilling life!
Enjoy!
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
 
Cognitive Dissonance
Values.pdf
Definition of Cognitive Dissonance:
Cognitive dissonance refers to the psychological discomfort experienced when individuals hold conflicting beliefs, attitudes, or behaviors. It occurs when there is a misalignment between one's actions and their deeply held values or beliefs, leading to a sense of inner conflict or tension.
 
Ex. from listeners and clients:
 
Ben believes in kindness and controlling his temper, but he’s so bitter with his ex that he is his worst self every time he thinks of her and it affects his current relationships. He struggles being kind when it involves anything with her, and justifies his rudeness.
Sara believes in self care and improving your mental health, but she can’t seem to make time for it personally. She gives and gives to her family and feels threadbare and on the verge of breaking down regularly. She is secretly resentful, but doesn’t share this with others.
Jake believes it’s important to cultivate his spirituality, but he doesn’t do much besides show up for church. He never seems to find the time to read scriptures, pray, or meditate.
Lindsay wants to get in better physical health, but instead she just puts on more weight and finds herself shopping and eating more, in attempts to avoid her marriage and parenting problems. 
 
3 Quick Tips:
 
10 Minutes of Self-Reflection on Sunday Mornings: Take time to reflect on your core values and beliefs. Identify areas in your life where your actions may not align with these values. Honest self-assessment can help you recognize areas for improvement. (ex. I value learning and cultivating talents, but I’m not modeling that for my kids or I value family togetherness and quality time, but we’re all on screen every evening)
Set Clear Intentions: Define clear intentions and goals that are in harmony with your values. Whether it's in your personal relationships, career, or lifestyle choices, setting intentions aligned with your values can guide your decision-making process. (ex. I signed up for an art class and we’re having a family meeting on how it’s important for ALL family members to cultivate talents and live intentionally without making excuses).
Practice Authenticity: Be true to yourself and prioritize authenticity in your thoughts, words, and actions. Act in accordance with your values, even if it means stepping outside your comfort zone or facing challenges. Living authentically fosters a sense of integrity and inner peace. (Ex. being brave on social media or lovingly confronting a friend that says hurtful things about what you value. It is remembering that you are as important as the others in the room and that you also deserve respect. It’s acting as if you believe that, and also where you treat them as if they matter as much as you do. Another example is treating drivers or clerks with the same respect you’d want).
A few other quick thoughts:
Cognitive dissonance is a gift. It teaches us something is wrong. Sometimes it feels like guilt, but we can prevent it from feeling like shame and challenge thoughts that say “I’m wrong” and change them to “what I’m doing isn’t in alignment with who I am and who I want to be.” When you’re so uncomfortable, you finally change. 
Find mentors that will elevate you and get you out of complacency and justification. Pay for things that will help you become your best self.
Stop saying why you CAN’T. Explore how you can say yes.
If it’s a priority you’ll find a way, if not, you’ll find an excuse.
Live your life believing things will work out and not why they won’t (ex. Trainings, travel, financial independence, optimal health, spiritually strong).

120 | Mastering the Art of Relationships & Parenting with Dr. David McMillan

Show Notes:
Welcome to a thoughtful episode of Fulfillment Therapy featuring the seasoned psychologist and author, Dr. David McMillan. With 40 years of experience to his name, Dr. McMillan offers valuable insights on improving marriages and transforming your approach towards parenting. Through our candid discussion, we uncover nuanced details about relationship dynamics by exploring his 'Sense of Community' theory and his profound principles on managing emotions.
Dr. McMillan introduces you to the four fundamental elements that bind relationships - belonging, power and trust, trade, and story. He walks us through these elements and their subcategories, providing a clear road map for nurturing relationships, acknowledging differences, and balancing personal needs with responsibilities of parenthood.
One of the highlights of this episode is the exploration of Dr. McMillan's enriching books, 'Create Your Own Love Story' and 'Emotion Rituals'. His profound literature presents unique guides for building rewarding relationships and managing emotions. From cultivating belongingness to appreciating individuality, his advice is primed to positively reshape your interpersonal dynamics.
In a detailed conversation about emotions and relationships, Dr. McMillan postulates the significance of creating a positive momentum in interactions for stronger bonds. He also emphasizes the need for partners to let go of ego and cultivate a nurturing spirit that enriches their relationship. Pointing at the concept of 'flow' in relationships, he advises couples to glide in harmony with life's rhythm instead of attempting to control the dynamics.
As we explore the realm of parenting, Dr. McMillan suggests that teaching values to children is more effective than imposing penalties. He encourages listeners to approach relationships and life with curiosity, openness, and humility. To delve deeper into this pool of wisdom, visit Dr. McMillan's website and discover more ways to enrich your relationships.
Enjoy!
-Kendra
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
 
*Find Dr. David McMillan's books on drdavidmcmillan.com

119 | 5 Keys to Success: Discover What Matters MOST & How to Get It

Show Notes:
Welcome to today's episode, where we uncover the keys to personal success and fulfillment. Success is not one-size-fits-all; it's about defining what matters most to you and taking intentional steps to achieve it. We also talk about how to address other's opinions surrounding our paths. So, come join us today as we explore the five essential keys to discovering your unique path to success.
Enjoy!
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
 
Success
Values.pdf
Key Takeaways:
Reflect on your core values to guide your decisions and actions.
Channel your frustrations into setting clear, actionable goals aligned with your values.
Embrace continuous learning and growth to fuel your journey toward success.
Cultivate resilience by reframing failures as learning opportunities and persisting in the face of adversity.
Celebrate your progress and small victories along the way to boost motivation and reinforce your commitment to success.
Quotes:
"Values are like lighthouses; they are signals giving us direction, meaning, and purpose." - Unknown
"It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are." - Roy E Disney
"Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” - Benjamin Franklin
"Success is not the destination, but the journey. It's about the person you become along the way." - Kendra Nielson

118 | Marriage Power Struggles: Rethinking Power Dynamics in Modern Families

 
Show Notes:
In today's episode, we discuss Terry Real and how to navigate disharmony, empower your relationships, and create thriving families. We learn the importance of prioritizing repair in conflicts, embracing vulnerability, and addressing unmet needs proactively. By working on assertive communication, mutual respect, and sharing responsibilities, we pave the way towards a more supportive environment for healing and growth within our families. Through compromise and resolution, we pave the way for stronger, more resilient relationships, and foster a harmonious and fulfilling family life. 
Enjoy!
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
 
Marriage Power Struggle Tips:
Practice Active Listening: Take the time to truly listen to your partner's perspective without interrupting or invalidating their feelings. Seek to understand their point of view before expressing your own, fostering open communication and empathy.
Foster Mutual Respect: Cultivate an environment of mutual respect where both partners' opinions and contributions are valued. Avoid belittling or dismissive language and strive to treat each other with kindness and consideration.
Share Responsibilities Equally: Divide household chores, childcare duties, and decision-making responsibilities fairly between partners. Collaborate on important decisions and tasks, acknowledging each other's strengths and contributions.
Set Clear Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries and expectations within the relationship, respecting each other's individual autonomy and personal space. Communicate openly about your needs and preferences to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts.
Seek Compromise and Resolution: Approach disagreements with a willingness to find common ground and compromise. Focus on finding solutions that benefit both partners rather than winning arguments or asserting dominance. Be proactive in addressing conflicts and resolving issues together.
"It's not disharmony that's the problem, it's the inability to go from disharmony to repair that is the problem." - Terry Real
 "Under the patriarchal system, you can either be connected or powerful, but you can't be both." - Terry Real
‘Neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord’ (1 Corinthians 11:11).”
“Men and women are equal—one is not superior to the other. They are also different, with different roles within a family. Both men and women fulfill their highest purpose together as husband and wife, not separately.” -LDS Website 
“We have learned by sad experience that it is the nature and disposition of almost all men, as soon as they get a little authority, as they suppose, they will immediately begin to exercise unrighteous dominion.
Hence many are called, but few are chosen.
No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;
By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile…” -D&C 121:39-42
"Family pathology rolls from generation to generation like a fire in the woods, taking down everything in its path until one person, in one generation, has the courage to turn and face the flames." - Terry Real

117 | Kensi's Sexual Abuse Story, Part 2: Navigating Complex Trauma & Cultivating Courage

Show Notes:
Today Kensi Evans is back on the show in Part 2 to share her story of sexual abuse. My friends, it is so insightful, authentic, and informational. If you’ve experienced sexual abuse, or have a loved one who has–which is probably all of us–you won’t want to miss this. She’s such a gem and this episode is packed with life changing perspectives that are going to help you in your own healing journey. You can thank her later, because you’ll want to. 
 
I hope this helps you in your own healing
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
 
 

116 | Kensi's Sexual Abuse Story: Navigating Complex Trauma & Cultivating Courage

Show Notes:
Today Kensi Evans is back on the show to share her story of sexual abuse. My friends, it is so insightful, authentic, and informational. If you’ve experienced sexual abuse, or have a loved one who has–which is probably all of us–you won’t want to miss this. She’s such a gem and this episode is packed with life changing perspectives that are going to help you in your own healing journey. You can thank her later, because you’ll want to. 
 
I hope this helps you in your own healing
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
Save on the $600 off the flash sale! Apply the code SAVE600 to get $600 off our last flash sale for the Costa Rican Retreat when you sign up on FulfillmentTherapy.org. 
 
Our Adventure & Personal Growth Retreat includes:
All-Inclusive 6 Day & 6 Night Stay in Costa Rica
Luxurious Private Villa overlooking Bay
Enjoy Latin Cuisine as our Private Chef prepares 3 meals / Day 
& Drinks at our Unlimited Open Bar (fancy non-alcoholic drinks included)
Airport shuttle To & From Included
Professional Therapists / Coaches & Expert Team
Women’s, Men’s, and Couples Retreat at Neighboring Villas
5 Specially Created Fulfillment Meditation Sessions
Immersive Training to Elevate your Relationships & Personal Life
Transformative Meditation sessions and yoga
Private Villa is a short Walk from a Quiet, Beautiful Beach (rare for most retreats)
Breathtaking, Unforgettable Excursion in Nature like Ziplining, Hanging Bridges in the Rainforest, a 1500 ft Jungle Water Slide, Waterfall Hikes, Hot Springs, Volcanic Mud Baths, Snorkeling with Sea Life
Sailing, Surfing, Aquatic Adventures, Saunas, and even more…
Breakthrough Fulfillment Workshops + Coaching, Professional workbooks and resources
1 Week Pre-Retreat Virtual Integration Materials 
Costa Rican Retreats 

115 | Are you Building a Safe, Secure Bond for your Spouse & Children?

Show Notes:
Today we’re discussing how you can know if you’re creating a safe, secure bond with your spouse and children–and what happens when you don’t. If you didn’t grow up with safety and security, today you’ll learn healing tips so you don’t unknowingly pass on generational dysfunction. Want some bite-sized ways to increase connection and secure that bond with your family members? Today you’ll get exactly that so you can build greater family fulfillment, and become your higher selves within your family.
Episode Notes:
Welcome to today's episode. Today we’re going to talk about one of the foundational aspects of family life: building a safe, secure bond with your spouse and children. This bond forms the bedrock of a thriving family dynamic, providing stability, trust, and emotional security for all members. Join me as we explore why this bond is crucial, how it helps families flourish, and practical steps you can take to strengthen it, especially as we approach the summer months. We'll also touch on healing from past wounds and traumas to improve your current connections with your loved ones.
Why a Safe, Secure Bond Matters:The safety and security of the family unit are essential for fostering healthy relationships and overall well-being. When family members feel safe and secure in their relationships, they are more likely to communicate openly, express their emotions freely, and support each other through life's challenges. This bond serves as a foundation for building trust, resilience, and intimacy within the family, creating a nurturing environment where everyone can thrive."Family is not an important thing. It's everything." - Michael J. FoxExample: Imagine a family where mutual respect and trust form the foundation of their relationships. Children feel safe expressing their emotions, knowing that their parents will listen without judgment. This environment fosters emotional intelligence and resilience in the face of life's challenges.
How a Secure Bond Helps Families Thrive:A secure bond between spouses and children lays the groundwork for a connecting and fulfilling family life. It fosters a sense of belonging and acceptance, allowing family members to be their authentic selves without fear of judgment or rejection. This bond provides a framework for effective communication, conflict resolution, and problem-solving, enabling families to navigate difficulties with grace and unity. Ultimately, a secure bond cultivates deeper connections, stronger relationships, and greater overall satisfaction within the family unit."Family is the compass that guides us. It's the inspiration to reach great heights and our comfort when we occasionally falter." - Brad HenryExample: I know a family that shares experiences and traditions creates strong bonds between generations. Whether it's cooking together, sharing stories, or participating in family rituals, these activities strengthen their family's sense of identity and belonging.
Taking Ownership This Summer:As we approach the summer months, consider how you can take intentional steps to strengthen the bond with your spouse and children. Plan activities that promote quality time together, such as family outings, game nights, or shared hobbies (we’re starting tennis because it’s something my son is interested in).  Create opportunities for meaningful conversations and emotional connection (dinner, walks), whether it's through daily check-ins or heartfelt discussions about hopes and dreams. By prioritizing the safety and security of your family relationships, you can lay the groundwork for a fulfilling and thriving summer season.Example: Another family I admire sets aside dedicated time each week for a family adventure, whether it's exploring nature, trying new activities, or volunteering together. This intentional bonding time fosters connection and creates cherished memories for years to come.
Healing Past Wounds for Present Connection:For those who may have experienced a lack of safety and security in their upbringing, healing from past wounds is essential for building healthy relationships with your spouse and children. Seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist to process and heal from past traumas. Practice self-compassion and forgiveness, recognizing that you are deserving of love and belonging. By addressing unresolved issues from the past, you can create space for greater intimacy, vulnerability, and connection in your current relationships. (why therapy is important)“Our brains are wired for connection, but trauma rewires them for protection. That’s why healthy relationships are difficult for wounded people.” -Ryan North“Until you heal the wounds of your past, you are going to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work… with sex; but eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength to open the wounds, stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in your past… and make peace with them.” -Iyania VanzantExample: I think most of my clients would agree with these quotes. The deeper we go to heal past wounds, the more their able to move from protection and defensiveness to connection and openness. 
A secure bond is the cornerstone of a thriving family, providing a safe haven for love to flourish and grow.Healing past wounds is essential for building a foundation of trust and intimacy in your present relationships.By prioritizing the safety and security of your family relationships, you pave the way for deeper connections and greater fulfillment.
Tips:Schedule regular family meetings to check in with each other and discuss any concerns or challenges.Practice active listening and empathy to validate your family members' feelings and experiences.Create rituals and traditions that foster a sense of belonging and togetherness within the family.1% Ways to Build Secure Bonds:Set aside dedicated family time each week for a game night and focus on positivity, laughter, and funSchedule daily couple check-ins to share their thoughts, feelings, and experiences to deepen your bond and understanding of each other (no screens or distractions)Start therapy to heal from past traumas and learn healthy coping mechanisms to support your children's emotional well-being.
Building a safe, secure bond with your spouse and children is a journey worth investing in. By prioritizing open communication, emotional connection, and healing from past wounds, you can create a nurturing environment where your family can thrive. As you take ownership of your role in fostering safety and security within your family relationships, you pave the way for deeper connections, greater fulfillment, and the realization of your higher self.
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests

114 | Summer Bonding: Creating Family Traditions Without the Eye-Rolls

Show Notes:
Welcome to Episode 114 where we explore the power of family traditions in allowing for lasting connections, joy, and resilience. This episode encourages parents to navigate through the common dread of planning summer activities by understating the importance of simplicity and shared experiences. Get ready to learn how to brainstorm a fun, inclusive, and manageable summer bucket list that caters to the varying interests and age groups in your family.
We discuss the need to shift from minimal family interaction towards fostering a strong family bond through diverse activities and events. Tune in to discover practical tips and strategies that not only cater to different age groups, but also minimize complaints, promote enjoyment, and emphasize character development. This episode offers a comprehensive guide on how to balance personal and collective family time, highlighting the importance of flexibility, adaptability, and mutual accommodation.
Experience our analysis of how positive and negative attitudes affect family dynamics and understand the importance of emotional regulation, setting boundaries, self-care, and the ability to relax when necessary. Realize the potential of summer traditions serving as the vital glue that holds families together and creates enduring bonds.
Embrace the simplicity of summer traditions and the power of involving everyone in the planning process, ensuring everyone feels valued and invested. This episode is a great resource in your journey to strengthen your family bonds, build resilience and create memorable summer traditions that contribute to true and lasting happiness in your family.
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests

113 | My Sexual Abuse Story Part 2: How I Healed & What I Learned

Show Notes:
Today I’m sharing my sexual abuse story publicly for the first time (part 2 final). It’s raw. It’s real. It’s still hard. Guest co-host Kensi Evans is back to interview me about my experiences. We discuss healing, growth, and challenges that continue even today. Join us to find out how you can heal from your own wounds- AND have patience for yourself and others in their healing journeys. 
I hope it helps you in your own healing
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
Save on the $600 off the flash sale! Apply the code SAVE600 to get $600 off our last flash sale for the Costa Rican Retreat when you sign up on FulfillmentTherapy.org. 
 
Our Adventure & Personal Growth Retreat includes:
All-Inclusive 6 Day & 6 Night Stay in Costa Rica
Luxurious Private Villa overlooking Bay
Enjoy Latin Cuisine as our Private Chef prepares 3 meals / Day 
& Drinks at our Unlimited Open Bar (fancy non-alcoholic drinks included)
Airport shuttle To & From Included
Professional Therapists / Coaches & Expert Team
Women’s, Men’s, and Couples Retreat at Neighboring Villas
5 Specially Created Fulfillment Meditation Sessions
Immersive Training to Elevate your Relationships & Personal Life
Transformative Meditation sessions and yoga
Private Villa is a short Walk from a Quiet, Beautiful Beach (rare for most retreats)
Breathtaking, Unforgettable Excursion in Nature like Ziplining, Hanging Bridges in the Rainforest, a 1500 ft Jungle Water Slide, Waterfall Hikes, Hot Springs, Volcanic Mud Baths, Snorkeling with Sea Life
Sailing, Surfing, Aquatic Adventures, Saunas, and even more…
Breakthrough Fulfillment Workshops + Coaching, Professional workbooks and resources
1 Week Pre-Retreat Virtual Integration Materials 
Costa Rican Retreats 
 
Sexual Abuse
My experience:
 
Neighbor kids abusing me between 3-5.  I remember feeling like it was my fault and I was a burden, so I didn’t share again.
Family member abusing me around 5 or 6. Never recovered enough to have a healthy dating life after that until mid-college. “Not that bad” mantra. Rarely talked about it.
 
4+ in high school that I didn’t see as abuse. I thought it was my fault for getting into the situation.
 
What helped me find healing?
Counseling in undergrad and grad school, talks with husband, A LOT of journaling, trauma therapy / visualizations, VALIDATING my experience, classes, psycho-education
 
Sexual abuse robs us of our sense of safety and trust, but through healing, we can reclaim our power and rebuild our lives.
 
Speaking out about sexual abuse is not just an act of courage; it's a vital step towards breaking the cycle of silence and stigma.
 
Healing from sexual abuse is not a linear journey; it's a series of brave, incremental steps over decades.
"It's my fault": Victims often internalize blame for the abuse, feeling responsible for what happened.
"I'm damaged": Victims may believe that the abuse has irreparably harmed them, leading to feelings of worthlessness or inadequacy.
"I'm alone": Victims may feel isolated, believing that nobody else understands what they're going through or that they're the only ones who have experienced such trauma.
"I can't trust anyone": Due to betrayal by the abuser, victims may struggle to trust others, fearing that they'll be hurt again.  (I can’t rely on anyone)
"I'm powerless": Victims may feel helpless and powerless, believing they have no control over their lives or their circumstances.
 
    3.What have I learned?
The lasting impact of trauma on mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
The importance of setting and enforcing personal boundaries. (learning the importance of your voice and saying no)
The significance of seeking support and finding safe spaces to share experiences.
The resilience of the human spirit and the capacity for healing and growth.
How our wounds make us who we are–and how scars help us discover our purpose.

112 | My Sexual Abuse Story: How I Healed & What I Learned

Show Notes:
Today I’m sharing my sexual abuse story publicly for the first time. It’s raw. It’s real. It’s still hard. Guest co-host Kensi Evans is back to interview me about my experiences. We discuss healing, growth, and challenges that continue even today. Join us to find out how you can heal from your own wounds- AND have patience for yourself and others in their healing journeys. 
I hope it helps you in your own healing
-Kendra
 
ALL LINKS → https://linktr.ee/fulfillmenttherapy 
Website → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org
Contact → hello@fulfillmenttherapy.org
Instagram → @fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Community → http://bit.ly/fulfillmenttherapy 
Facebook Group → Private FB Group 
Schedule 1:1 Coaching → https://fulfillmenttherapy.org/1-on-1-coaching 
Chat → 1-986-910-5172 *text questions & topic requests
Save on the $600 off the flash sale! Apply the code SAVE600 to get $600 off our last flash sale for the Costa Rican Retreat when you sign up on FulfillmentTherapy.org. 
 
Our Adventure & Personal Growth Retreat includes:
All-Inclusive 6 Day & 6 Night Stay in Costa Rica
Luxurious Private Villa overlooking Bay
Enjoy Latin Cuisine as our Private Chef prepares 3 meals / Day 
& Drinks at our Unlimited Open Bar (fancy non-alcoholic drinks included)
Airport shuttle To & From Included
Professional Therapists / Coaches & Expert Team
Women’s, Men’s, and Couples Retreat at Neighboring Villas
5 Specially Created Fulfillment Meditation Sessions
Immersive Training to Elevate your Relationships & Personal Life
Transformative Meditation sessions and yoga
Private Villa is a short Walk from a Quiet, Beautiful Beach (rare for most retreats)
Breathtaking, Unforgettable Excursion in Nature like Ziplining, Hanging Bridges in the Rainforest, a 1500 ft Jungle Water Slide, Waterfall Hikes, Hot Springs, Volcanic Mud Baths, Snorkeling with Sea Life
Sailing, Surfing, Aquatic Adventures, Saunas, and even more…
Breakthrough Fulfillment Workshops + Coaching, Professional workbooks and resources
1 Week Pre-Retreat Virtual Integration Materials 
Costa Rican Retreats 
 
Sexual Abuse:
My experience:
 
Neighbor kids abusing me between 3-5.  I remember feeling like it was my fault and I was a burden, so I didn’t share again.
Family member abusing me around 5 or 6. Never recovered enough to have a healthy dating life after that until mid-college. “Not that bad” mantra. Rarely talked about it.
 
4+ in high school that I didn’t see as abuse. I thought it was my fault for getting into the situation.
 
What helped me find healing?
Counseling in undergrad and grad school, talks with husband, A LOT of journaling, trauma therapy / visualizations, VALIDATING my experience, classes, psycho-education
 
Sexual abuse robs us of our sense of safety and trust, but through healing, we can reclaim our power and rebuild our lives.
 
Speaking out about sexual abuse is not just an act of courage; it's a vital step towards breaking the cycle of silence and stigma.
 
Healing from sexual abuse is not a linear journey; it's a series of brave, incremental steps over decades.
"It's my fault": Victims often internalize blame for the abuse, feeling responsible for what happened.
"I'm damaged": Victims may believe that the abuse has irreparably harmed them, leading to feelings of worthlessness or inadequacy.
"I'm alone": Victims may feel isolated, believing that nobody else understands what they're going through or that they're the only ones who have experienced such trauma.
"I can't trust anyone": Due to betrayal by the abuser, victims may struggle to trust others, fearing that they'll be hurt again.  (I can’t rely on anyone)
"I'm powerless": Victims may feel helpless and powerless, believing they have no control over their lives or their circumstances.
 
    3.What have I learned?
The lasting impact of trauma on mental, emotional, and physical well-being.
The importance of setting and enforcing personal boundaries. (learning the importance of your voice and saying no)
The significance of seeking support and finding safe spaces to share experiences.
The resilience of the human spirit and the capacity for healing and growth.
How our wounds make us who we are–and how scars help us discover our purpose.